To Procreate, or Not To Procreate?

It's so hard to decide to have another baby, or not!  Since Macen has been born it has brought up the conversation between me and John, naturally, and we are both indecisive about it.  I honestly can't imagine being pregnant again...EVER!  There is so much to consider...

First, we have to have a bigger house, and to have that, we need to have jobs that will support our new family and the bills.  By the time that happens, Collin will be three or four, and after Collin can talk and poop in the toilet, I'm not sure I will want to go back to getting up every two hours every night and not knowing why the baby is crying.  John and I also have a lot of things we want to do as a couple, and another baby will make those things even MORE difficult.  Would Collin benefit from a sibling?  I just don't know...

It is hard to commit to following through with the decision even though I know once the baby got here, we wouldn't regret it.  Neither of us really want to stop working to stay at home with our children because we like what we get out of working.  I wish there was a computer service where you could put in your life choices, and it would calculate the correct choice for you.  Blah! 

Collin is so cute, it WOULD be a crime to leave him an only child...I just don't know...I guess we will see what God has in store for us since he is the computer system that maps out our direction!  We just have to trust in him!! 

So friends...what do you think?  Baby, or no baby? 

And Off He Goes To Save The World!

Deployments are many things.  They are scary because you worry about your loved ones safety.  They are sad because you miss that person while they are gone and you think about them every day.  They are stressful because there is so much left to chance.  You go about your life as best you can even though you are missing such a big part of it.  You do your best to focus on positive emotions and thoughts.  Even though I'm sad and I miss my sweet husband, I am so proud.  I am so proud that my husband is part of the three percent of Americans that serve in our military! 

I do pretty well going on with our day to day routine.  Believe it or not, the hardest days are when I do get to talk to him, or if I miss a chance to talk to him in the middle of the night and then I can't go back to sleep.  Any unexpected knock at the door makes me stop whatever I'm doing to take a deep breath and brace myself.  The last thing I want to see when I open my door are two uniformed officers standing there.  I can't even think about that.  Every news story coming out of Afghanistan is hard to read becuase you know that some where there is a family mourning the loss of a loved one.  I get angry at our governments indecision about THIS war when I'm pretty sure if a close loved one of theirs was deployed they would be more willing to reach an agreement on what direction to take.  Collin is missing his daddy.  Right around the time that John would normally get home Collin starts crying and is inconsolable.  Defenitally behavior that I am not used to.  Today when he started getting upset I let him watch one of the videos John recorded for him, and that seemed to help...until it was over.  It will take some time to adjust to, and I'm sure by the time we get adjusted it will almost be time for John to come home.  But that's ok with me.  We will be ready with our arms open wide. 

I have no idea what things my husband will see and experience, but I know I will be here to support him no matter what because he is my one true love.  He just has to get home, and we can handle the rest.  We have such big plans and so much to look forward to and I'm excited for him to come home so we can get started! 

John is my best friend, my sweetheart, my husband, my hero.  There is no possible replacement for him in our lives.  We will see him very soon, but for now we live the day to day!

 



To Fill You In

I haven't posted in a while because I have been busy with all the happenings in the Dozier's lives.  A lot has happened since my last post, so here is a quick recap. 

March brought my beloved brother in law home from his deployment to Afghanistan.  We had a great time welcoming him home and watching the excitement on his face when he saw his very pregnant wife's belly for the first time.  Homecomings are so emotional and exciting! 

April 1st brought our newest Dozier boy into the world!  Macen Leland Dozier is an April Fools baby!!  He came just in time so his daddy would have some nice time off to spend with them since he has been gone for so long.  It was great to welcome this sweet little man in to our lives.  It's amazing how quickly they change and grow.  He weighed 5lbs 13oz and was 19 inches long on this birth day, and is now almost two pounds heavier, and growing more and more every day.  He has the cutest little sneeze, and gets hiccups about once a day!  Megan and Mark are great parents and are handling this new journey very well.  Collin, on the other hand, isn't so excited!  It will take him more time to get used to not being the baby anymore.  One day they will be best buds and we won't even be able to tell that he used to sneak up to Macen and smack him when we weren't looking! 

Now we are preparing for another deployment.  John leaves for Afghanistan this week.  I wish he wasn't leaving during exam time, but there is little I can do about that.  I am ready to get this last deployment over with because after this he has a year left and then he is getting out of the Marine Corps.  I am looking forward to never telling him goodbye again!  I am not looking forward to the next seven months.  Collin and I will miss John tremendously.  I will be keeping myself busy by any means necessary. School, house projects, hanging out with my little man, traveling to spend time with family.  Whatever has to be done to occupy my mind.  Please pray for his safety and peace of mind during this deployment.  He will need it! 

So that is that past couple of months in a nut shell.  I will keep everyone posted on the Dozier happenings as much as possible.  Talk to you soon:)

The Thing About Couponing

I am all for saving a buck on my grocery bill, but "extreme couponing" just doesn't seem logical to me.  Do these people build a special pantry just to store all the "2 for 1" deals, and "buy these and get those"!  I can only stock so many year's supply of vitamin D, peanuts, coffee filters, bright pink lipstick, and...adult diapers?  I just don't have the room to hold on to those for 50 plus years!  There is a new show coming on TLC called "Extreme Couponing", and in the commercial it shows a lady that bought $600 in groceries and only paid $6.45 for them!  WHAT?  How is this even possible?  Where do people put this stuff? 

I am not cut out for full time couponing, but I do get excited when I save a few dollars on the items that I actually need!  Even if I save ten dollars a trip, that's forty dollars a month.  It's better than nothing and I don't have to build a storage tank to keep all my adult diapers in! 

A Little Treat!

Yesterday I treated myself to a pedicure!  It's one of life's little pleasures that I enjoy every once in a while!  It's so nice to sit in a chair that gives you a massage, while your feet soak in a bath of warm water, and just relax.  My favorite part is the foot massage, of course!  After that I could care less if they painted my toes or not, but they do! 

I chose a pretty Spring pink today and got a little flower design on my big toe!  This hour is the best way to end the week!  After a little time drying under the UV lights, you are ready to step outside with your pretty toes.  I always feel a little better about wearing my sandals when my toes look nice. :)

I hope all my girl friends have had a pedicure at least once in their life.  If you haven't, you must!  It will be love at first visit!!

Now I'm ready for Spring!

My Diet is Almost Done!

I've been on a 500 calorie diet for 18 days and have lost 20 pounds!  Go me!!  I know it's not the healthiest diet, and I'm not going to do it for much longer.  Only about 13 more days to go, and hopefully another 13 pounds, at least! 

It's so hard to stick to.  I try to get excited about my plate filled with 3 ounces of chicken, 3 ounces of either cucumber, celery, or asparagus, and half a grapefruit or a medium sized apple with a side of two Melba Toast rounds!  Doesn't that sound yummy?  No?  That's because it's not.  It is ok for a couple of days, but after that, you don't even want to eat at all because you're just not excited about what you get to eat.  I could try some different recipes since there is an entire book full of them for this diet, but that would require more work for a meal that still won't be that exciting! 

I'm going strong.  Still kicking myself in the butt for gaining all this weight in the first place, but now I know.  I have tried to add workouts to this diet, but I end up feeling sick and light headed at the end of them.  That should be easier during the maintenance faze of the diet. 

So here's to dieting!  It's not fun, but it is rewarding!!

Single Parenting

First I would like to salute all the full time single parents reading this!  I am a part-time single parent when my husband is gone training or deployed, and it is exhausting!  Collin likes me to be involved in everything!  If he is eating, he wants me to eat some too!  If he is playing, he will bring it to wherever I am so I can play with him!  On the rare occasion that he is watching tv, he has to be IN my lap!  If I get up to make him dinner, he is crying at my leg saying, "ME, ME, ME"!  As soon as his feet hit the floor he is going 100mph!  When I hear him in the morning I have to prepare myself for the day!  All of his daycare teachers say, "You have your hands full"! 

When you have a baby that needs a lot of attention like Collin, you feel like you have to get everything done while they are either at daycare or sleeping.  You do anything to avoid the constant crying!  I drop him off at daycare, go to class, home to get homework done, try to throw down some groceries, and clean up whatever I need to before I pick up my man because I know once he is home, there is no time for anything other than him!  Then there are the days when you have to grocery shop, or take the car in, or go to the doctor, all of which take up valuable time.  Then you come home with your crazy kid, and are welcomed by dog puke all over the floor!  Clean that up, then it is PLAY TIME!!  "OUTSIDE! ME! BALL! SUDA! ME ME ME!".  Then comes dinner time...where Collin usually doesn't like what I cook so he ends up eating bread or nutrigrain bars for dinner!  The only guarantee I have is macaroni and cheese!  Then it's clean up, bath time, book time, "TEETH"!  Luckily, Collin is a great sleeper!  Always has been!  So after he goes to sleep I get to clean up the Leggos all over the floor because he couldn't just play with ONE, he had to pour them all out, and then decide he's done with the Leggos, and move on to his cars!  Clean up toys, dinner, take the dog out, feed the dog...then, and ONLY THEN, do you get to sit down.  It is a rough twelve hour day, every day when you are a single parent.  I LOVE food, but I often forget to eat because there are other things that I feel are more important. 

I am very lucky to have family and friends near by that help me out!  Aunt Megan, or Meme as Collin calls her, is a great help.  It's just nice to have someone else to run after him every once in a while, and to make sure he stays out of the knife drawer!  Hannah and Jake watch Collin for mommy's girl nights, and Collin loves them!  He is missing his daddy a lot right now so any guy willing to play with him makes him happy!

I am freaking out a little about John's deployment coming up.  Seven months...SEVEN...by myself...single parent!  John has been gone for 4 weeks and I'm already exhausted and can't wait for him to come home.  I miss having John to entertain Collin while I get other things done around the house.  The thing I miss the most is John getting up on Saturday mornings with Collin and letting me sleep in!  Oh...I miss that!  And I miss John!  He's such a great daddy and partner.  It's hard to pick up his slack!